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3 Mar 2008 8:21 AM

You Might Be in a Texas Church if...
# The doors are never locked.
# The Call to Worship is Y'all come on in!
# The Preacher says, I'd like to ask Bubba to help take up the offering, and five guys stand up.
# The restrooms are outside.
# Opening day of deer hunting season is recognized as an official church holiday.
# A member requests to be buried in his four-wheel drive truck because, I ain't ever been in a hole it couldn't get me out of.
# In the annual stewardship drive there is at least one pledge of two calves.
# Never in its entire 100-year history has one of its pastors had to buy any meat or vegetables.
# Prayers regarding the weather are a standard part of every worship service.
# A singing group is known as the OK Chorale.  (as in OK Corral, the movie)
# The church directory doesn't have last names.
# The pastor wears boots.
# The only time people lock their cars in the parking lot, is during the summer and then only so their neighbors can't leave them a bag of squash.
# There is a special fund-raiser for a new septic tank.
# Finding and returning lost sheep is not just a parable.
# You miss worship one Sunday morning and by 2  o'clock that afternoon you have had a dozen calls inquiring about your health.
# High notes on the organ sets dogs to howling in the parking lot.
# People wonder, when Jesus fed the 5,000, whether the two fish were bass or catfish.
# The final words of the benediction are, Y'all  come back now, ya hear!

~~~~~taken from another website

     

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